wtf someone played my fucking brickbreaker games and lost i had ten fucking lives. ughhh
maybe you did when you were drunk
no way, i wasn't THAT drunk.
you were saying "i am the vodka queen!" and then in a different voice replying to yourself "all hail the vodka queen! you are so beautiful!"
when we got back we had sex. but it wasnt til the morning that i figured out her leg was broken
You know, he picked a really shitty time to stop sleeping with me to pay attention to his girlfriend.
Peeing in public by noon, this is not a good indicator for the day.
In need of cum proof mascara. Don't judge me.
They called it unicorn pee, and i thought that was interesting so i drank it. Please don't let me drink strangers booze again.
Im playing lifeguard in my own bathroom. How's ur night?
He tied me to the bed, fucked me and left me tied up until he proved to his room mates that he actually fucked me. But other than that, best sex ever!
Well I think I made it pretty obvious I wasn't in to it. I was drinking a beer while he was going down in me
He pushed a skinny white blonde out of the way just to tell me "you have the finest ass, like ever."
I have never loved a nerdy white boy this much.
I'm cutting her off I can't have my good name soiled with these kinds of shenanigans
Shit is preposterous
I'm gonna be the best dressed mother fucker to ever get kicked out of that damn bar.
The party bus is stocked with 5 hour energies and beer and someone handing out adderall. Best. Wedding. Ever.
Some sorority went “Dick or Treating” at a frat house and now the Halloween parties are canceled
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