THEY JUST PLAYED KISS FROM A ROSE TONIGHT IS PERFECT
IM SAVING ALL MY LOVE FOR YOU
I don't want it.
drunk me is my new role model. he's fearless. like not even afraid of tornadoes.
i really should have bought real food rather than condoms, olives, coleslaw and beer...
We did lines off of a Whitney Houston CD case. That makes everything okay.
I'm not saying I'm drunk, but I'm definitely saying my liver has its work cut out for it.
You're lucky I'm tired or I'd take a pic of me mounting a reindeer yard decoration
plus there's no nice way to tell a guy you physically hate the shape of their cock.
You put your finger on my lips and told me 'the butt is nature's pocket'.
I don't remember that at all, but I stand by what I said
Just saw a dude dressed as captain america driving down the highway. He saluted me.
I'm tired of being known as the Great Giver Goddess of the Almighty Pity Bone.
Talking to him sober hurts my brain
Oh, and let me go get some popcorn, watching you make your own decisions should be quite the shitshow.
Enough talk of my burning loins. How is your day?
That’s talent right there. Maverick and Goose type shit.
Randomize