I've decided that life's journeys are more fun when your moral compass hangs in front of you and swings with each step
If there was chocolate on Regis Philban's dick, I would totally lick it off. That's how desperate I am for some right now.
Why would you say my penis is small in front of so many people?
I don't know what you drank last night but you really enjoyed the 4 egg body shots.
i was about to rearrange the room but realized that this is the only efficient setup where we can have sex while the other one's asleep without them accidentally seeing.
there was a trail of blood coming out of one of the bathroom stalls. thought of you
We stayed up until 4:20 AM. The next thing I remember was waking up at 4 PM, like my internal alarm clock knew.
I'm 11 for 13 getting drunker than the person who's birthday it is
you're right. a strip only looks good in porn . mine just looks like a fucked up mullet
can i bring anything?
Any of the following: Sex doll, side dish, fruits/vegetables that look like dildos, beer
is there a theme i should know about?
I rammed pretzels and Jell-O shots down the throats of those I loved.
I mean I've seen her tits but I don't know what her voice sounds like
Just because your drunk doesn't mean you can stick your dick in the snow. Just a FYI
For future reference: When the bouncer is approaching you to remove you from his bar, you don't respond by taking off your pants.
Just do what I do and listen to your vagina. She’ll growl when she smells good dick
Randomize
