dude i just saw the hottest 13 year old but she was kinda ghetto.
Lets date for the summer
what?
Dont love me in September.
I didnt attack him, I heard I threw a chair at him- big difference. And you know Im not a creep so whatever
when your hometown is famous for abortion clinic bombings, hurricanes, and jude law's newest bastard, its probably time to move.
you had a panic attack, pissed yourself, and started crying. you never go above the kiddie level of my lil bros schools haunted house ever again.
round 2?
EVER.
Your sister got a Brazilian yesterday. It looks great
legit been throwing up since 7am. told my parents the two bowls of puke in my dorm were soup
I just reenacted what a cuntadactyl would act like by putting straws in my mouth as teeth and roaring, Plz come get me.
we kept pushing you at the prospective students saying go for it, itll make them want to come here
you kept yelling THIS ONES FOR THE ADMISSIONS OFFICE and then youd go in for the kill
I'm pretty sure last night was the first time I've seen someone drink beer-soaked paper towels. Ever.
and PS, please don't fuck in the corn maze, k?
The melted ice in my drinks tonight is probably the most water I've had in like 3 days accumulated.
I'm really having trouble focusing on shark week with this erection
I think there's a problem with society when I'm shopping for lingerie and I think "man some of these would make kickass shirts"
Rigtt?!
No. No. Fuck you! You can do your own grocery shopping.
Randomize
