i love my job...i have craft hour at my desk w twizzlers
can u grab me a application
i don't mind that he's uncut. i like it! it's like a little sweater!
a cock doensn't need a sweater! especially a skin sweater! wtf.
That's like some buffalo bill hannibal lector shit.
I feel like i'm in "To Catch a Predator - The Musical"
New realization: eye makeup remover takes sharpie off boobs
he rubbed his balls on my face to wake me up.. this friends with benefits thing is getting out of hand.
Just looked in the mirror and i look like ive been gang banged. Im so proud of my boyfriend it almost hurts
He bought you footie pajamas. Shit's pretty serious.
Also I stopped in the middle of the road and put my hazards on because BUNNIES WERE PLAYING
there's a drunk hobo under the bridge wearing a jester hat and screaming at women
MIDGETS
????
The day I let him eat me out will be the day that Donald trump is an honest, kind, non-bigoted member of society
Where can I buy a stripper pole at midnight on a Sunday?
I love you.
Bad choice
I told her I wanted to go swimming and she responded with jello shots, taking off her clothes, and jumping into the pool...I think I'm in love
Three cans of beer can fit in the shower catty... multi tasking
Randomize
