WHY DIDN'T ANYON E TELL ME SHE WAS SIXTEEN
Turns out, Windex will cut right through semen stains on a computer case.
just watched her puke in her purse and put it back on the bar. then half hour later put her hand in her bag to get a pen to give me her number. I bet she is game for anything
I still can't believe I found a dildo in my ceiling today.
I believe some people would call last night an orgy.
I mean, I can get to know him eventually. The time frame doesn't really matter. I'll have sex with him regardless of whether he's interesting or not.
I let a naked juice spill down my leg for like 30 minutes bc i thought i was hallucinating that my leg was cold.
I hope after we constantly bang for 2 days straight we can agree to be friends again
They said I was more of a mess than the German. I have achieved the unachievable, you may bow down to me
I just threw up again because I opened my eyes... God is laughing. I resorted to taking the Mexican Dramamine because I feel seasick from walking. Not helping.
Sex is always the answer.
Especially if the question is: what have I not had this year?
Well, I can mark "throwing up in a daycare bathroom due to a hangover" off my bucket list.
I just got nudes while talking in the third person. Not sure if I Should be proud or ashamed.
One time she showed me her pierced nipples in our high school locker room and now she has a daughter
Dick is dick. I’m not turning it down because he’s younger than me. Covid has been a real cockblock and I’m a woman with needs
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