We can't ever have kids because there's a chance that they'll end up just like us.
Only you could turn Mozart into a stripper song.
Calling yourself a modern day Geisha doesn't justify being a whore.
Its what im here for. Critiquing penis photos.
That's right. If she can't abide by the rules then she gets booted. It's like survivor booty call edition
I took 20 bucks from you because when I woke up I saw more of you than I ever wanted to see bro.
Totally acceptable.
I can feel the judgmental stares of Christians from around the world right now.
He's writing a strongly worded email to Trojan right now
I TOLD YOU THE BARESKIN CONDOMS WEREN'T AS RELIABLE.
I spent half an hours grinding with a drunk Harry Potter cosplayer at the con rave. Pretty sure I felt his wand.
If I hid at school to avoid the cops, is it fleeing and evading or just being a good student?
It was good. Ended up having a 3 hr make out session with her
What is this high school
There was a lot of catching up to do bro
Are you vicariously golddigging through me?!
She was a little thick, but we banged on the beach and fireworks went off as we finished so I think God wanted it
I mean I did fuck her boyfriend, the least I could do is post happy birthday on her Facebook wall.
for future reference, singing eye of the tiger outside my door while i am having sex makes me incredibly uncomfortable
apparently not uncomfortable enough for you to stop
Randomize
