Great. Don't do shady things like that ok?
If I would have known that wiping my dick on her pillow would have caused her to leave........
Im am drinking whisky alone in my parents basement. I think I just watched the point of no return stroll by.
saturday- my day is open, my legs are not. you in?
well apparently not.
I tried ok? my penis just doesnt like her as much as my mother does
I thought about farting is his face when he was going down on me last nite.
I was just about to send a concerned text until I opened my door and saw a shopping cart. I'm glad you made it home in one piece and with toys.
Doubtful. That seems irresponsible. The 4th will kill you if you stopped drinking until then. Let's think logically.
You told me to pour the Gatorade on you "like Flashdance"
Received a verbal warning at work for "riding in a trash receptacle, violating professionalism & infection control."
Remember the 3 things that are off limits? They're fair game if you get here in the next 5 minutes
Jumanji is 1000% better stoned while cooking breakfast.
Seriously? A BAR is SPONSORING my 21... What did you do for your 21 again??
If I'm gonna have a rotation of guys, I really should stop them leaving boob bruises...
Just met my future wife. Please dont fuck her.
Randomize
