nut hugger
Yeah. I woke up naked in his bed this morning and remember saying "Get a condom cuz I can't afford an abortion right now" last night. He didn't run. He's a keeper
fine then we can just have courtesy sex i definetly won't like it
I had a terrible day! The only thing that makes me feel better is knowing Jack Bauers day was worse.
You text him a porn site address and said GOODBYE ... I think he got the hint
For the record we tried to find 4th of july porn. Did not turn out well.
I played ping pong,drunk, with my hand instead of the paddle. And i won. I have hidden talents
I can't ever date him again. Whenever I see his face I just remember helplessly pissing myself in my car.
Find me a cup with a lid so I can illegally drink in your car. I'll be there in bout 10 minutes.
He came on my pillow pet. That's unacceptable. I hate boys.
I think when Jesus turned water into wine it was a sign that we should get drunk off Sangria tonight. Do it for Jesus. He died for your sins.
I told myself I'd stop after three shots of fireball. Haha HA hA.
Emojis can't explain what he felt when that ass dropped
I think I just read the whole internet. Front to back.
I made a bucket list last night. Number 5: Will marry a wizard.
Randomize
