Far right against the wall..hiding come find me. dont tell oyhers hahaha
So the hot 23 year old i went home with last night is really 17 and was here for orientation.. i feel like a pedifile...
In that case, you should probably come up to the union, orientation is in full swing, your kind of guys ;)
cunt.
it always starts out as a suggestion then three hours later I have cum in my eye.
we screwed to my bar mtzvah tape, I became a man while watching myself becom a man
You better drive. If I decide to let them talk me into a 3-way, I don't want you to be stranded.
All I remember is running out of the bathroom with one shoe on and the other in my hand. Pretty sure I was yelling as well.
Good afternoon everyone! Just texting to inform you that Andrew, your emotionally detached man-whore, will be back starting this weekend. Please RSVP.
we're meeting twins and drinking tequila. i love life
My boobs are literally freaking out because I've been wearing a bra for more than three hours....I need to go out more...
You offered the police officer a Snickers ice cream bar and cried when he wouldn't take it...
And if you haven't kicked a pigeon you haven't started your morning right
Nice. Ask if they watched saved by the bell. yes=legal. No=jailbait
We fucked to Bonnie Tyler in my car. He's the one.
Oral stamina is what keeps life exciting
I shit myself and fell down the stairs and I’m still finding shit In those pants.
Randomize
