He is fucking rediculously sexy. DO HIM NOW. NOW. NOW. NOW.
People are allowed to visit it's just they can't be from Germany and have to wear masks.
Soo....this goes on the list of odd coincidences. My gyno calls me while I'm going at it, leaves me a message. I check it later... thank God I tested negative.
I think horse shit smells the best of all shits.
I told my girl, that I use to jerk off to Star Trek. All she says is, "Oh my gawd, you're such a trekie!". If I was her, I'd be weirded out more than me being a Trek Fan.
You probably havent been upstairs if you think that the microwave missing its door is bad
I mean I'm forever immortalized as the one who puked in his dad's straw hat.
What's the point of having 3 fuck buddies when their periods all seem to sync up
He had Jail Releases phone number programed into speed dial on his phone.
I'm so confused. I feel like I just intentionally took roofies to see where I'd end up.
you're good to come back. The bouncer pulled me aside and told me. He also said you have nothing to worry about and that you have an awesome "upper punch" or some shit
I'm ready to sell my soul to the strip club tonight
Whenever I see women with terribly drawn on brows, I just wanna tackle them and redo them and run away. I'll be Brow-lady. The beauty superhero
Maybe next year when I'm 30 I will be over puking at lunch on Fridays. Maybe
I've peed in two sinks in the past two weeks. No one should be able to say that.
Randomize
