Uhhh...do I owe you any money? Or an apology? Or anything?
People in love make me want to vomit
Are you going to tell your therapist we boned?
also, did you notice that when he quoted your email he used MLA format?
i realized our last day of finals is on cinco de mayo....it's god's way of saying drink ridiculous amounts of tequila and wear sombreros
I saw a stripper quit while on stage to months ago nothing you tell me will amaze me
My prof gave me extra credit for drawing a ninja on my paper and writing "ninja will up my grade"
I'll just have to do enough fangirling for the both of us. Nipples engaged.
Y'all best leave this "I can only have a couple drinks" shit at the door. U don't drive to Yukon to have a shot. I'm getting u fuckers drunk.
I guess my vagina missed him because it called and left a 5 min. message. Color me impressed
Waffles and pussy, what else is there?
But he's super into Jesus and I'm the devil. So we weren't meant to be
Please just help me figure out where the bruise on my face came from.
Is it bad I use my AA meeting to hookup with guys?
I'm driving to work hungover. I feel like I got hit by a train and then drank that train too.
Randomize