yo i just woke up i feel so weird, and the absolut is still fill, so is the 30, what the fuck did we drink last night man? And will you please come out of the bathroom.
Bro... we didn't even hang out last night??
stupid gm bankruptcy made me miss the showcase showdown
Those cock suckers. We need to know who's winning the hot tub and the vacation to the alps
That bad?
Full length cargo pants, running shoes, and a partial unibrow. Alcohol really is blinding.
He also has a monumental penis. It's unbelieveable. I'm sorry but he's perfect.
Can I get a "hallelujah" for railing my pastors daughter last night?
hes out at the street wearing a tophat and a monocole and carrying a cane and greeting every car that drives by
he just went across the street and into someones house and we could hear him inviting them over from the front porch
He chipped a tooth on the first beer. You know the night is just going to be a slushy mess after that.
First time on E and Chris took me to a petsmart during puppy day. I might die of pure awesomeness.
You force fed me pizza in bed last night. That was fun
Just got blown whilst wearing a glow in the dark superman t shirt. Your night will never be as good as mine.
I mean obviously I like your dick... Jury is still out on you but your dick is good
He was playing minecraft so I took a shower with my vibrator
He just said "I know you want my cock" and I said nah. I want food bro
I don't know what you slipped me, but my TV is vomming blood right now. Thanks, jerkoff.
He licked me while I ate pretzels and chips. I was really living my best life.
Randomize