no more hot dogs for you........
fine no more vajj for you
Aren't I supposed to sit on your face?
I got "discovered a new religion high" last night
you just stared at your feet and said some shit about the molecules dancing and how you had just solved physics.
I am highly attracted to the men and that's all i can say. I do not clap and make noises but i do turn to the side and say how i'd do incredible things to them if given the chance
Her tits were the only thing that upgraded her from "no way in fuck" to "drunken mistake"
Tonights theme there is the 7 deadly sins. Greed, envy, sloth, gluttony, sluttiness, fellatio and vodka.
This is the weirdest negotiation ever.
This is what happens when two people with zero shame try to argue.
How many tongue depressors should I need to steal from urgent care to make samurai armor?
I don't know. Something about answering "what did you do on Sunday?" Seems odd when the reply is, painted, went to the grocery store, put a restraint device on my bed.
My dad just sent me a text reminding me to bring the family beer pong championship belt. Thanksgiving 2012 just got real
Lusting after Beyonce when you're a lesbian is like having a crush on Jesus. You just don't do it.
He was only in jail for 4 hours before he was someone's prison wife
I can say with absolute certainty the only time we ever had a civil conversation was when we agreed we both liked pizza.
The waxing lady fingered me during my brazilian. 40 dollars well spent
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