forget your mom, you can see her anytime. A one night stand only happens ONE night.
I'm fucking your sister right now.
You motherfucker
She's next.
I mean if she was naked in my room I would talk to her
He sent me a pic and IT CURVED OUT OF THE PICTURE! Curved. Out. Of. The. Picture.
How many weeks is it acceptable until I can start bringing freshman back?
I totally just potholed and almost crashed while trying to lick salsa off my boob.
Haunted Houses: fun, lame, or love to sneak off and get fingered in the dark alley way?
He licked my mouth. I felt like I was making out with my dog.
I have no idea why my husband is mad that I came home at 4 am & all I want to do is eat spaghettios. It's not fucking spaghettios fault.
sidebar: i fucked your brother last night
I know but we're going to blackout city so it'll probably be warm there
Like your dick isn't Beyoncé, it doesn't get close ups
Fucking suck it up and drink your feelings like a normal human being.
Congrats you've received dick pics from an Olympic silver medalist
man do I wish I knew who this naked guy in my room was...
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