I might get fired at work today. I had to prioritize. It's not my fault Cockasaurus came over.
hahaha our party bus just died on the freeway and we're drinking in the center divider. i'm on the roof. i win
no where in the syllabus does it say "no alcoholic beverages allowed".
I may do that, fyi I'm even more sore than I was yesterday. It's like the ghost of your dick is still inside me.
running the faucet water is not hiding the sound of you vomiting. fyi.
I can't even type what I drank. I'll throw up
As she was leaving she said "You have an awesome penis, I hope to use it again soon" I need that on a business card to hand out at the bar
I'm in a pile of cheezits at an unfamiliar location watching dateline on tlc. Stage an intervention.
We HAVE another bedroom, it's not like I was gunna chain you into the closet. Often.
That's right. I did.
You are the saddest 25 year old gay man I've ever had the displeasure of knowing.
How many times do I have to tell you I'm not bisexual.
.....unless there is alcohol involved
Ahha guy saw me buying beer, went "hmmmmm" and nodded his head approvingly. No words exchanged, but he has made his way to my heart haha
I can't believe you tried to cock block me from A DIFFERENT TIME ZONE.
So I hung out with an australian but woke up with a British man in my bed does that make me culturalized
We somehow ended up in Oklahoma. Nick's been crapping for two hours and I'm afraid to call a doctor because who the hell knows what sort of stuff goes down in the middle of nowhere. So not a great long weekend really.
Randomize
