I mean, he was my book buddy in 1st grade. The kid taught me how to read, the least I could do was give him head.
Does she know that uploading nude photos to photobucket and networking are two different things? You may want to ask.
look up what dreaming that you're in a lesbian relationship with a manatee means.
at some point i feel off my bar stool straight into the arms of a gay guy. just my luck.
I hate that he uses me for something other than sex. What does he think I am? His girlfriend? Ha.
I think I sprained my soul last night
I can't drink with the moms anymore. All they talk about is lactating.
You are so lucky you didn't go back to Tate's house. They decided to figure out who had the biggest balls... I was the judge
The people at subway are so judgy when you stop to get a sandwhich on your walk of shame
I mean it was fine and all but I just don't understand why a man would need all that Simon Cowell paraphanelia
Pretty good. They took the stitches out but it still hurts like a bitch. The doctor says I should be off crutches by next week.
Well, that's good. Let's hope drunk you doesn't sabotage you.
I'm watching Russian dudes pole-dance. For research.
He told me to leave him behind and bury him in his batman pajamas. So two lessons I guess, don't give Tom whiskey and don't touch his daddy issues with a twenty nine and a half foot pole.
beggars cant be choosers....im desperate and he has a dick. he checks all the boxes.
I told him I lived in the apartment beside his brother and he said "oh, you're the girl that watches really loud porn!"
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