I'll just stay a virgin forever then
You still have to go anyway
Then I guess I'll have to start sleeping around
Writing a book: The Evolution of the Douche Bag: From Popped Collars to Ed Hardy Shirts. Doing research now.
Make sure you include chapters on white sunglasses, spray tans, and toxic amounts of hair gel.
Hey when you come over to pick me up in the mornin bring a camera. This is going to be legendary. Don't knock.... They might cover up
what if every blade of grass was a penis?
Just passed an anti-circumcision dude with a sign. Handing-out-bibles guy has been officially one-upped.
Just saw a woman walking a golden retriever and a vacuum down the road. I miss downtown.
it's a gatorade, cheez its, and regret kind of morning....
He left a trail of vomit straight from our dorm to the bathroom. Looks like we have our identities for the rest of the year.
A valiant attempt to obtain a backhoe was made
Let's just not urinate on things that don't need to be urinated on
He might not have any marketable talents, but the kid dry humps like no other.
I'm not sure... But I think I just found a porno I starred in during my black out week of '08.
Is it totally terrible that I just signed up for classes and already found the guy I'm going to bang??
god i just can't wait for finals to end so i can just masturbate all day and night
You kept running around yelling "I need my pajamas" & then you got naked. Shit just went downhill from there.
Randomize
