i wonder what megan fox's vagina feels like.
Heaven soaked bacon.
Don't EVER smell your tampon
It's like a party bus, but there's a glass, airtight wall separating the driver from the passengers, and once everyone's on, they pump vaporized THC into the cabin.
I just showered sitting down with a sippy cup of water in there with me. It took 40 minutes. That hungover.
She just made out with a golden retriever. I'm disgusted and turned on all at once
So this is what you do on your hungover days off put your balls into an egg carton?
Kyle found me outside his apartment in the hallway. Said he didn't hear me knock bt smelled alcohol through the door. I'm sucha bitch to my liver
When he saw my tits he said "wow you should be proud.
You can't have your cake and publicly stick your dick in it too
So my parents just watched me pour their rum into a bottle and only add crystal light powder, no water... Talk about being judged. All I could say was "Cortland tricks?"
Hey know anyone who wants 58 lbs of whole frozen chickens for a couple bowls?
Drinks have officially taken priority over self-respect, and I'm not even all that torn up about it.
he ended the message XOXO, who the fuck does he think he is GossipGirl.
I’ll always remember that day you sent me that random nude on accident lmao changed my life
someone is getting fuckign RAWDOGGED on this campus as we speak and it makes me FURIOUS
Randomize
