is it odd that your cat looks tougher than you?
Contrary to popular belief alot of woman do actually enjoy sucking cock.
i just saw an ambulance and a fire truck pull away from the dorms. it appears somebody actually IS feeling shittier than me today.
They should try giving mcdonalds to cancer patients because it just cured the worst hangover ive ever had
then she kicked a hole in her own door and the next thing you know, brian's walking up to her room with power tools. in no condition to use them
i wish it would rain vodka just once. i have not puked yet bring it on
I swear they were about to hook up!!
I know because I was in the tub taking an imaginary silent bath. They stopped cuz I gagged on my shot.
Watermelon juice. Makes everything better. Gin. Wine. EVERYTHING.
Best sex of my life. But I think it's because I like his apartment. Really nice bed sheets. High vaulted ceilings. I wanted to lay there forever.
You're getting old. Was it located in a nice school district for your future offspring?
yeah she's crazy. she fought a possum in my alley because it was "being a cagey little cunt"
Come get your pancakes and take a nap in my boobs.
They said you went back in for 30 minutes and were walking with your arms out like an eagle soaring
Because I chose to live vicariously through your uterus and you're letting me down right now.
I just got wasted for $3.50. My life can't get any better.
That sounds good. I'd totally blow you somewhere quick but im not in the frame of mind to think of a place
Be outside in 5
Randomize
