Free beer happened. I got hammered and aaron did his first keg stand. Then went all martha stewart on redecorating the bathroom. I remember being at walmart
What theme did he decide on for the bathroom?
Well as you know martha loves the northeast this time of year. I believe the theme was 'coney island' decorrated with hot dogs and macaroni
Does transporting jello shots count as driving with an open container?
i have a dinosaur tramp stamp
He was actually able to throw up in the bucket from the top bunk. im impressed.
drunk sex in a shower = bad idea broken arm
A man pulled out his penis last night and when I said I wouldn't touch it, he said, "that's fine it just needs to breathe".
I made out with all three roommates...I didnt realize that was actually an awkward situation.
With the amount of g's you put on going I'm gonna guess you're drinking alone again
where are you guys? the police just woke me up on the couch outside.
If you're going to drink sriracha straight from the bottle whilst crying, at least wear the giant sombrero for the enjoyment of your audience.
I'm facebook/twitter stalking the guy I just slept with as he's passed out next to me. What a time to be alive...
I've decided to take one for the team and bang the landlady for lower rent.
EX BOYFRIEND'S TWINS WERE BORN TODAY. THIS CALLS FOR A MARG.
she was sitting on the toilet asking for me to take a "cute facebook profile picture" for her
Or is it distressingly heterosexual?
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