If you liked it then you shoulda put your dick in it, oh uh uh oh
I just saw a girl walking up the hill with a little red wagon full of booze... I want to be in her study group.
I like that we make it a requirement to howl at the moon every time we get drunk together.
What part of I'm done do you not understand? Im not going to send you sex photos to prove I've moved on..
Let's just say he sent me a picture of his dick and I was more impressed with the collection of video games he had in the background...
I think I'll handle my grief by throwing myself headlong into lesbianism. Seems like a fitting tribute to you.
I'm not sure whom I'm texting but I put you in my phone as last nights fuck budy, and I'm just curious if I left my clutch with you?
Buy Actually if the police need to find my body I'm on an air mattress in an apartment near a McDonald's that's all I see out dat Window
How do you explain to a guy that he's like a little puppy dog that you play with, but then leave at the shelter to go home to your German Shepard?
Just stuck all that extra cocaine money we made in a savings account...like a responsible adult..
Tell them to carpool to pride, have a 3way, and if one says 'no thanks' just tell em it's not gay if it happened in a 3way!
She shit all over my seat. She is not allowed in my car under any circumstances. Not even with drugs. You can't forgive a shit.
Sex with him is like pizza, it can be shitty but its stillll pizza.....
Is there a word in the English dictionary for impressed, yet disgusted?
I think the word you're looking for is flabbergasted.
I just bought a bottle of lube for my car.
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