Pussy?
how
Wat do u mean how?
He yelled GOOOOAAAALLL when he came.
I kissed a girl and did not like it. Now I hate Katy Perry even more.
He was drunk at Denny's at 5 am saying how Dear John was the worst movie he has ever seen... eyes filled with tears.
Apparently I did my philosophy paper last night. It's not bad either.
they told me they were banning four lokos so yeah i did have to buy 42 of them
I woke up and he used my makeup to write "hope you don't get pregnant" on my mirror before he left
We are there now. They have a giant cock and balls with an eagles face and wings.
Thank you, I really appreciate that. I know I couldn't participate in class tonight and I hope that doesn't affect my grade too much. So please let me know of any extra credit opportunities such as fellatio
In local news, attempts to hide phone from extremely drunk self prove unsuccessful for Dallas woman.
Just bought a colored water bottle so my classmates can be so judgemental when I bring beer to class.
She just called at a dance party, and you stopped mid puke to join. Another successful night.
:(. i have vodka in a fire extinguisher. that solves all problems. except fires. it would actually make that worse.
She totals her lexus and all she wants is to have crazy wild sex.
There. There is gum on my butt cheek IT IS NOT MINE
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