I remember having a drink with vegetables in it. They said it was a mojito, but it tasted like cabbage.
haha i love mojitos
ya and i hate cabbage
Then you got really excited when I upgraded you from puke bowl to puke bucket.
first day of class and my professor asked me if i was going to come to class drunk all semester.
I need a second opinion on who's blood is in my car.
I cannot for the life of me remember why I am holding this rabbit.
I will come to your office dressed as a bloody mary, hug you then leave is that a good plan?
yes. bring a barf bucket too. just. in. case.
I figure a girl that drinks as much as I do should always have pregnancy tests on hand
Then mom squeezed my boob and said, "Dad would go nuts if I had these..."
god. I was just thinkin about the fact that there was a time in our life when we didn't drink.
She's drunk as hell locked up I. The bathroom with my shoes where do I go from here
Within the first 2 minutes of this morning, I found out the Lions lost on last play, and Scott Weiland died. I wont be in today.
I mean, we were all drinking, but I'm pretty sure kidnapping came up.
Is it rude to send him a, "happy birthday, I hope you finally get an STD" text?
The walk of shame was so much longer today. i have to start fucking guys in my own postcode.
Sometimes you have good days, sometimes m you delete 360 screenshots off your camera roll.
Randomize
