it's not the walk of shame if you do it in cowboy boots.
quit re-tweeting John McCain's tweets
Plotting your own moral demise should not be this fun
its coolsest when we hear the beat in our water bottles. and the likghts are in his eyes now. oh holland
When did we convert life to cartoon?
How do you feel? I threw up in a towel. Also, a lot of other things.
Yep I can make a seagull sound. It's identical. I tried it. They thought I was talking to them. It's pretty cool.
So apparently my mom hired someone who goes by "DJ Dog Dick" for the family christmas party?
Im pretty sure breakfast wine is a thing, and if it isn't, I just invented it
She started calling me daddy on the second date and I don't know how to react to that
Good luck. While you're suffocating on a dick, I'll be eating pizza rolls. Being a good girl.
When your job has killed your spirit to the point that you don't want to flirt with the cute, tall guy at Enterprise
GIRL PLEASE. GO BACK AND POP THE TITTY OUT
But on a side note, how the fuck do you "accidentally " get peed on
I haven't listened to news as I've been having lesbian sex all night. Anything new?
Omg dude take a shower. You'll feel like god washed away all the sinful shit we did last night.
Randomize