how many beers do i need before it is acceptable to sleep with sam
enough that when i make fun of you for it tomorrow you wont even remember it happening
I got drunk and smashed his tv with the keg and so he blames me for being evicted.
he opened up his "box of magic": a crusty tube of KY jelly, three expired condoms, a fingertip vibrater, and a jar of marshmallow fluff.
This guy in church just had a prayer request to help him get through his hangover. He is my new hero.
all i know is that each time we woke up we were at a different chinese restaurant. help.
we're havin a 400 loko party for joe pa's 400th win. come get loko
Quick question... Can I call you daddy? Or would that just really made the whole 8 year age gap a bigger deal...?
you know who we are? We're the female white stoner version of Kenan and Kel.
Tomorrow, you will get a text, and it will bE spelled right, that's me yo, certify ya soon
Probably twitter. Never underestimate a psycho girl with wifi
If I got everything I wanted in the world, I would have been forcing soup down your throat hours ago
It's Breast Cancer Awareness Month!!!! What random hook up should check my tata's this year?!?!
How do I figure out the name of this sleeping naked guy in my bed?
I used to sleep with a guy on the USA rugby team... He stole my credit card and my Hitman DVD. I'm more upset about the Hitman DVD..
My last Google search was 'can an impotent man have sex'. I don't even want to know what I did with that guy.
Randomize
