she said, "is it ok if I touch it?" that's when I knew I was in trouble... I knew she was a virgin but seriously..
it only took me 1 hour to write 8 pages. i'm never doing school work without adderall ever again.
on a side note you can NOT make bong water out of a pear
It's like a mixture of two words
"town" and "Im too drunk to spell right now"
3rd rule of buttsex she must be clean and shower recently
and skipped dinner
To say he's a good fuck is like saying the beatles had a bit of success. My vag is still mourning the fact he moved.
Driving around Panama at 7 am looking for an open liquor store..
It was honestly like he was directing a porno or something. he kept telling different people to grab other people's boobs, it was all very artistic.
Just saw a guy I fucked in a clown suit in the bar. It's not Halloween. I have got to start making better life decisions.
omg sorry but i tried to stop you when you were at your drunk limit but i took my eyes off you for like 2 seconds and you suddenly appeared with hard liquor in both hands for yourself and downed them and it was downhill from there
It all started with sending him a text about Spongebob. It escalated from there.
I am seriously only coming over if there are McNuggets. I want 10 bitch. Honey mustard.
Your favorite boobs are sending you seasons greetings
Do u ever find yourself high af, watching American ninja warrior and crying at the athletes stories?
Talking to a customer about getting high and staring at glow in the dark wheels while there is a cop in the store. Just another day in Tampa
Randomize
