i am sorry to ask, but i need y0ur honest opinion . when i turn sideways to someone, does my nose stick out like a beak ?
All I remember is yelling at him to admit he liked Bon Jovi, then accusing him of giving love a bad name.
my mom just served us mashed potatoes with an ice cream scoop. When I asked her why, she said she thought it would make dinner 'more fancy'...
No, I stopped taking my meds because I like crazy me better
idk whats worse playing power hour to yourself, or the fact that you were having fun while doing it
IF SOMEONE ASKS YOU IF YOU WANT THE GOOD DRUGS YOU SAY YES.
He ate me out on the kitchen floor while we waited for the cake to bake. How was your Valentines Day?
I need a "closed for the season, thanks for a great summer" sign for my vagina
Between the puerto rican elf, the fat marine, the deaf guy and the ex coke head I've got a good preview if the men in this city...
No more morning sex. Just for once, my vagina would like to go to work bone-dry and bone-free.
i sent my dealer a picture of the money i would pay him. i also told him i would pay him in cheez-its if he would prefer that.
The CEO is on this whole 'what do you do with your spare time?' kick. Umm... get drunk and have sex in bar parking lots.
I apologize that you just fell victim to my random thought of how to make a blow job come to life via emojis.
My next goal in this relationship is to teach my boyfriend that there are valid reasons to be fear of dolphins completely.
I have no idea what happened last night but I sobered up whilst showering with a mop.
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