I just wish we had the ability to download food from our TVs.
operation harelip BJ is a go
You were in the bathroom for two hours practicing "Revenge Faces".
No I remember falling down the stairs I just don't remember it hurting.
My rats are drinking wine. I am drinking with rats. God i am so alone.
I found his backpack for the weekend. All it had was ping pong balls, mardi gras beads, and Tums.
Judging by the hole in the wall by the door, the mis-matched shoes by the door, and the door hanging off one hinge... i'd say he's on the loose.
I'm standing outside of the bar watching homeless men teach a kid how to pee of the sidewalk.
in my defence, i did try to get you to put your shirt back on, then you screamed at me to stop telling you what to do
You know that joke about taking tylenol pm and jerking off? you don't always win. sometimes you wake up in the morning naked lubed up cock in hand to the realator and would be perspective buyers laughing at you
I just used a baby fork as a roach clip. I am totally the cool aunt.
His new place is a molesden. Like a hole in the ground. It's frightening how oddly private it is.
It rubs the lotion on it's foreskin...
No it'll be my boobs and the luge part will be from my nipples. Everyone will be sucking beer from my perfectly sculpted and partially melted tits.
I can't get past the whole vibrator up the ass stunt.. Can we have a ceremonial burning for his dignity because I will not ever touch that again..
Didn't know my clit could produce that many orgasms in one night. Fuck my husband; think I might have to become a lesbian.
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