its like they have never seen someone walk through campus with a plunger
If im paying 4grand for laser eye surgery, it better help with beer goggles cuz last night was pretty rough.
I'm going to be blunt here. I don't actually care what you're doing tonight. I just need to know if I need to shave or not.
Somewhere during foreplay he said something about me only being with two other guys... I just went with it cause we have never had that conversation...
Just saw a cop give four blondes gas for their car on their way to Vegas. They seriously ran out of gas and called 911 about it. Its like a porno plot.
Oh come on. There's no way I was the only female choir student taking shots in the back room.
I feel like letting the same guy who shot him dig the pellet out of his leg with a pocket knife was the bigger mistake
i havent blinked in 235 seconds. now 247. now 258. 263. 267. 271. i also have been gifted with theability to both type and count and not blink. 293 so magical
Just started taking liver support pills. Welcome to Senior year.
he also bled all over my floor. unrelated to cats but true nonetheless.
Faces of meth called, they want their look back.
It would be magical, all 2 min of it.
I just used a box o wine to refill a bottle o wine to more effectively drunk clean
I apologize for there being a shopping cart in the living room. I don't know how why or where i got it.
It’s the biggest dick I’ve ever seen. His IQ drops 25 points when he’s hard because there’s no blood going to his brain
Randomize
