I just blew up the bathroom at work and now I feel like a new woman
I had a good time, probably would have a bigger headache today if you were in town.
well if you came here i would keep you awake :*
did you just kiss me??? ... dude, im not gay
it seems that i get a boner from just about everything now
PS: the photo I uploaded for this internship site is the same one i used for my fake ID. I like to keep it classy.
I've started grabbing my boobs in front of my lesbian philosophy professor so she'll give me a better grade. It's working...
So fucked up. Can't tell if I'm starving or about to puke. Playing it safe and eating froot loops. Tasty in, colorful out.
I feel like passing out with my foot on your face has bonded us at a very fundamental level.
I mean you would really have to try to not have fun at a party that doesn't require pants....
Fell asleep with Kristen and woke up with Sarah. It's official, vacation has begun.
Me and some guy are crying in a port a potty together after another guy broke up with both of us.
At one point she put on my dads pants and yelled after him EMILIOOOO! Dude, my dads name is Mark.
Ive realized that in order for me to understand math, my professor has to be hot.
Ladies night is a gift from god. If it weren't for that, I'd probably be selling my eggs for booze money.
Getting knocked up by someone with a good job and a big dick, okay. I can handle that. Getting knocked up by someone who sells dildos for a living and has a tiny dick, SOMEBODY is losing a pair of balls.
Randomize
