this morning i woke up with my panties on and i knew where i was. success.
i guess you could say your face is two degrees of separation from my balls
woke up in a freezing tub of water at 6 am again. probably should stop the drunk baths
My parents showed me my IQ test from fourth grade, I'm shitting on my potential.
the realtor just took us to a house I had a one night stand in. I feel like it's a sign.
when it says do not use on the face or genital areas, it MEANS do not use on the face or genital areas.
Mystery lines found in a Pyrex dish in the back of my pantry at 415 am. No recall as to it's origin. Unidentifiable taste. Obviously I'm doing them
Ecstasy should be its own food group.
People around me are just doing lines of cocaine. Like its no big deal. And I'm just here like.... Y'all want some cheezits?
Remember Christopher who always sends me pictures of his penis? Look to your right, boy in the blue.
Betting for two different teams with two different guys is the best. Time to get $100 by one guy and laid by the other!
*6am blends another margarita* *615am blends straight tequila*
On another note, I almost lost one side of my fake butt. Dancing the wobble with the fake butt isn't recommend.
I think I gotta smoke less weed, I'm getting to lazy to fuck my girlfriend
first he passed out on the toilet...then hugged it and screamed no no no as i tried to pull him out
Randomize
