I wannas sexs uuuuu
Yeah, it wasn't as bad as I thought. I tried not to clench and things went pretty smoothly.
he pissed his pants, and she still wants to hook me up with him. I try not to date guys with bladder control problems... Unless they're loaded anyway.
you probably should not have drank the wine that everyone spits out. and the sad part, that was not even your low point last night
He said they were doing a skit in class apparently someone else is dressed like a horse. Ive never felt more proned to skipping class than now
you can now officially say a girl has shaved your initials into her pubes. welcome to the club.
The last thing I remember is feeding country fried steak to my best friend in a bubble bath with my bare hands.
All I know is I want him to tie me up at least twice a week and I have an overwhelming urge to cook for him. Could this be love? I'm so confused....
First time since we broke up that I'm not drunk before noon...win for broken hearts everywhere
Yeah we fucked. I ran into her the next day, I had to pick up the girl scout cookies I ordered from her boyfriends kids.
At least you didn't sleep with Ashley's uncle.
I was playing 'If You Had To Fuck One or Die' with the old composite pictures with a guy in the bathroom line. They were all pretty ugly so I go "You can tell this is a lower tier frat"......turns out the guy was a brother
HAMMERED.. I made a peanut butter and jelly sandwich with toilet paper instead of bread...
Juice tastes so weird without alcohol
Can I come over?
Sorry I gave up dick for lent. Hit me up on Good Friday tho
Randomize
