I got my nipple pierced! I love it so much!
Well, there goes breastfeeding.
Why does lindsey know I was naked in the kitchen?
I dunno... she just cried a lot and I kept sighing.
do you think the kids from 7th heaven are mad that dennis and sweet dee are their half-brother and sister?
I'm graduating. Then you'll never see me again.
We better fuck soon then
The party theme was heirs and heiress's. Most guys came in polo shirts but he came as the "arch duke of vagina".
Dorm room. In. Elevator. Fell in. Boom. Puke
There are bruises on the top of my foot. The pole won.
He's so hot and there's so much R Kelly and vodka I think I might die.
its gotten to the point where if her hand isn't on my butt i think we're in a fight
I gave his daughter swim lessons and in exchange he sold me an ounce. I feel so accomplished.
wtf guys I thought we agreed on no more knives. So much for not destroying the house
The cards I get dealt on tinder now are karma for fucking a married man while I was in high school.
Once my new license was put into my hand, a light from the heavens shined down and pauly D's voice was in my mind saying ohh yeaaah 21 yeaaah
If you really hate him do what I do: give him an amazing night of unforgettable sex then dump him. You’ll ruin sex for him because new girls won’t compare
Randomize
