I'm too stoned for this. I'm Canadian.
don't go back without me... they'll know i'm pooping.
i just stepped in cum. i hate you.
Thats what happens when you don't swallow.
he had a sign stolen from the tennis court hanging above his bed that said, "please limit play to one hour while others are waiting"
I'm going to skip that pointless convo with Mark, stick with the "we're talking" status, and bone barely legal, borderline gay, preppy guys on the DL.
it was one of those movies netflix should have sent weed with
he gets drunk and then tries to eat the lasers at the dance club
All I can remember is being told by a guy named Kyle to stay in the corner until the cops left. Then waking up on a porch outlined in beer cans 8 blocks from my house. Pregaming for college.
We hotboxed his closet and accidentally lit some of his shirts on fire... do we have a fire extinguisher?
This hurricane was the perfect excuse to buy 2 pounds of animal crackers and a case of beer. It's on Sandy.
Dude I woke up and he was pissing in the corner on his clothes... I called his name an he replied " I got this" and continued.
I told you, I'm taking a sledgehammer to your walls. Fuck your walls.
I'm Batman.
I told him I was gunna have sex with him in both of our cars at the same time.
I swear to god if I have to repeat this to you one more mother fucking time I will flip fucking shit and acidic rain will pour down upon your mother fucking soul
I just licked wine off my own thigh. I've hit a new low.
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