Are you going to tell your therapist we boned?
Im dancing with my grandma to Low right now at the wedding. There's no coming back from this.
I was drunk at peters. now im drunk at my apartment. and hungry. but mcdonalds is broken. wtf
you went around and groping mens pants to see "which was worthy" of you to go home with.
I think misery doesn't even think of me as company anymore. I'm an unofficial roommate.
I wish i had more things to dip in ranch... That's the most stoner thing i've ever said
I decided that $2 and a kiss on the cheek was a great tip for the pizza girl. No one is REALLY sure how much I've have to drink.
I'm literally partying with O.J. Simpson's son right now. I don't know what to make of this.
the only sentence i could make out from her was "i will wash these herpes away"
We have to use a contraceptive. God help the world if another one of us comes into fruition.
Just make sure my intervention has a theme...
Can we just talk about how awesome I am. I just slept with a new guy while listening to the previous guys bands cd.
finding an unopened condom on the ground can really change your outlook on the night
How does one go about breaking up with their bf on vacation?
I have acquired a mango...tonight is successful so far
Her name is susan
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