More dangerous that a broken heart and a shotgun.
Katy Perry is on a Proactiv commercial. That "I kissed a girl" shit is so much less hot now.
A very small part of me wants you to appreciate me for more than just my breasts. But the rest of me is breasts.
Give me the approximate price and I'll give you the equivalence in blowjobs.
We are going out Saturday. Oh and we might also be jousting on bikes.
Haha crisis adverted. Just told my dad I need to bone this guy. Nbd. He totes understands
He took shrooms and didn't want anyone to touch him. He kept saying he was a chip and he didn't want to break.
i'm sitting in class and looking at who would die if all the fans suddenly fell from the ceiling. i guess i have next year to pass history..
I just found a plastic cup with panties inside of it. Let's play CSI.
Btw...I puked in my hand last night and threw it on the floor. Don't let me do tequila ever again.
He asked me if I wanted to play "Edouard Mandevan," turns out that's French for Edward Winehands
He started going down on me while we were watching Land Before Time.
Incredible.
My sunday was babysitting three big, drunk, crying Swedes. Unless your day involved four or more giant drunk swedes I don't want to hear about it.
Also I feel like death. But like. In a good way
Noooo no no no no. She scares me. She means business. She wore a diaper when we went to the bar.
Randomize
