Doctor said I have sports induced asthma.
Call me old fashioned, but around here we call that "out of shape."
Yes, yes she is. This will teach her not to pull her vibrator out and harass people with it at parties.
After we fucked he shhhh'd me and said your welcome
Just heard my neighbor say "I'm just gonna lay down in a coma until someone comes into my room and hands me a beer." He's got his priorities straight
She wouldn't put out on the first date. I think my boner put a hole in my mattress.
We're looking for the removeable roof from her Miata. Winner gets a 40.
Btw I'm currently writing a paper in a beer garden. Be proud.
So, were they human bite marks at least?
Your guess is as good as mine.
We got out of the car in valet drinking beers we gave the valet one as a tip
Apparently I have decided there are no repercussions for my actions
and you fell through a lawn chair
It took 5 bourbons for him to handcuff and spank me and then he cried after sex. The men that like me are so unstable.
I assure you, it was not a Porn Hub Bee Movie parody.
I’m sorry, some of us common-folk don’t have access to steady dick
He’s only in town today and our afternoon sex sesh kept getting interrupted by the neighbor’s kid yelling and screaming in the pool
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