she was dressed as a doctor claiming that after she was done i would have a "permaboner"
You made eat vitamins until I threw up
I was sleeping on the bathroom floor and thought a wet towel might keep me warm.
Why am I a bad person? You were the one trying to get people to eat tape.
I decided they need a food cart that just roams around the library like the cotton candy people at the circus. But with real food. like tacos cause it sounds delicious.
It's not like I ment to feed you the shots of vodka, my hand just kinda slipped.
just puked a little into my hand/sleeve. way too hungover for the first day of class
WHO THE FUCK TAGS THEMSELVES AT COUNTY JAIL?!?!
I don't care if he got kidnapped by a cult one time he is a dick
I feel like telling him your vigina was older than him was not a good pick up line.
I think I died last night.
Yeah, you got carried home
Just seen a chubby version of you. Nearly kidnapped her. Perfect woman
it was like fucking a Mumford & Sons song
If I show up to the mall alone looking like I do to purchase a vibrator and some Japanese food, I would judge me too.
I woke up covered in thousand island dressing. I need answers.
Randomize
