You just made me feel so damn special
Man, ugly runs in her family
yeah, big time
he said i was weird because i want to have sex in public places.
i dont think thats weird i think thats fun
i forgot to tell you, he fell asleep outside my house again last night, but im weird
what ever happened to devon sawa?
fuck...who knows?
i'm really worried about him.
So you honestly dont remember putting honey in your bong? You kept talking about how you wanted to become a bee and fly
He poured syrup on all those broken dishes because "syrup is magical, and by the time we wake up, they'll be fixed."
Had sex on a washing machine in a pool of beer. Can you say success.
You are mentally unprepared to be exposed to my degree of perversion.
Sometimes I'm sad but then I realize that bagels.
I need five more minutes of sobbing.. AND THEN I will get back to studying
In case you're wondering what I'm doing, I'll be banging an 18 year old this weekend. Repeatedly.
You left me a message at 3am crying because you just found out there's a Paddington Bear statue in Peru.
So...#1 on my TO DO list for college is to fuck someone somewhere in the stadium during the homecoming game...you down?
You’d probably be happy to know that I think I’ve mastered the skill of knowing “my type” and then steering clear
FINALLY. I THOUGHT THIS DAY WOULD NEVER COME!
GOD I WOULD STAB DANNY IN THE EYE WITH HIS OWN PENIS
.........That big, huh?
No. I would cut it off
Randomize
