i think i have herpe
just one?
I'm such a slut...i kept having sex with him after he called me his ex gf's name. I just felt like i deserved something out of it too.
everyday i am more and more thankful i can still check the no box for "have you ever been convicted of a felony?" on applications
She's coming to town, taking me to a Suns Game, wants Anal, and knows we're not going to date, I imagine this is what heaven is like
please dont tell anyone i was drunk
you were publicly making out with a very old very spandex covered woman...they know
I havnt even moved into my new place yet and there's already a county sheriffs card taped to the door with my name on it asking me to call him
But he found my shoe...that at least deserves a handjob.
I'll keep you from getting pregnant and you keep my papers gramaticallly correct
I just figured out how I'm going to tie you to my bed. Hint: I may have to go to the auto parts store before you get here.
Why do you hate her?
She's dating the best penis that has ever entered my vagina.....
There's times when I need to be plowed... and I'm ashamed to admit auto correct was able to predict that entire sentence.
i’m just listening to christina aguilera’s “your body” on repeat and trying not to pass out at my desk.
i had every intention of working out now im just drinking wine and thinking about taking nudes in my thigh high tube socks
the guy working the counter at the liquor store noticed i got my haircut and said it was pretty.....
I covered the puke with a shingle there's not many chunks. I think it will blend quickly.
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