i hope you realize when i said "grib" earlier i was referring to the gridded binary, a mathematically concise data format commonly used in meteorology to store historical weather forecast data. also meant in referential conjunction to my probability math class that i am failing at roughly 215pm tomorrow afternoon.
I told him to go down on me and when he did he started crying!! I asked him why and he said my vag looked just like his ex girlfriends!!!
seriously when did my vagina become a soup kitchen for the poor
The moral of the story is do not hire me because everything will end up smelling like pickles and I will not sufficiently clean it up.
Have u seen my thong? Last time i saw it was drenched in vodka and on his brothers broken lamp.
Nah but tell him his boxers made it to the basement
I was gonna tell her, but there were too many tongues in my mouth
Using the random money I found in my bra from Halloween to pay to print my bio notes. I only brought a debit to the bar. College win.
If we accept the love we think we deserve do we also accept the sex we think we deserve?
When did angry sex become our thing?
You have mono. It's like being pregnant, your are excused from normal social niceties like responding to people.
how I know last night was a good night: this morning I found a bottle of tapatio, a bag of chicken and a bag of popcorn in my purse.
OK, but next time I'd like to be present for our make-up sex.
There was pot, but there are no Doritos, no Funyons, no Oreos.
Send help.
I'm now using my vagina for good, not evil. Trying to restore balance to the force.
I wrote notes to myself all over my body. "don't yell at cops again" "Cody stole your phone" "you kissed Cody" "vodka shots are bad for your liver" and "cactus pretty" WTF????
Randomize
