Of course we end up in a gay bar... And I have to tell you there are some hot dudes here, should I pass around your Facebook?
You can only be slapped by Eastern European waitresses so many times. I guess they don't want my huge cock in their iron curtain
i was so drunk that there were 2 of her, and i didn't know which one to fuck
i just realized that fran drescher is the 90's version of a guidette.
He googled "how long will i be drunk" and just started crying
So i'm in a museum and theres a punch bowl from 1765 with a picture of 3 men forcing the 4th to drink the punch bowl. Colonial hazing
I'm not sure...it could be the pasta I ate from her sink, the dominoes, or just the alcohol. Or a wicked combination of all 3.
I fcuked ip.
Is this your way of telling me that you got drunk in your office before meeting with your dissertation advisor again? Or that you finally banged that freshman fraternity pledge?
I would seriously fuck her so hard, her contacts would pop out of her eyes.
I don't know man, I have to ask my girlfriend if I can borrow my balls from her purse.
What was the point of renting a $600 trolley if no one even remembers going to the first bar?
Cleaned the whole house at 7:30 and after cleaning the bathroom I think I had cocaine on my sweatpants
I am drunk and aggressive about the olympixs
It's spelled Olympics
And on the 323rd day without sex, God finally said let there be light...or love?
Great, now I'm picturing myself as a fucking garden gnome
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