what is college for if not random hookup sex?
learning.
i would literally fuck learning if i could.
So there's 10 guys in this picture..I've made out with 5 of them. does this make me a slut?
eh 50% isn't bad..i'd say 80% is slut material.
oh ps. last night you kept telling me to calm down because everything was fine cause you were getting "arab money"...
Why were you having sex on top of my left over pizza in the kitchen?
Just got blown in a rental car. I need to get rear ended more often
I drunk-cried for all conjoined twins everywhere the other day.
So neither of us had a dollar bill and we couldnt find a straw so we spent all nite doing coke through penne pasta
But college guys get to crossfade so there's that
No idea what that is
Like getting bent? When you drink and smoke together...
I'm 30 stop using your cool kids words
Hey my dad gave me life the least I can do is take him chicken strips and a pack of marlboros.
I just sang Hey Jude with a homeless man and then we drank beer together. Then I watched asians take pictures under a xmas tree for an hour and fell asleep in an MGM Grand bathroom stall. #AloneinVegas
Yeah we invited her back for chicken nugget sandwiches
The date went significantly better after the fifth shot of fireball.
This guy wants me to put ice under his foreskin. What!?
Dude, I just masturbated with my cat sleeping on my boobs....
You have GOT to get this crazy cat lady thing under control. I'm finding you a man. And you'll take him, and thank me. After that text, you have no right to be picky.
please don't ironically join a cult
Randomize
