There's a sucker born every minute but swallowers are harder to find.
So glad I found your sister.
my ex just saw me in his brothers bed. fuck yes revenge feels good
I thought pig tail meant you were suppose to grab on to it when getting BJ
she has over 3,000 tagged photos on facebook. dont tell me she isnt annoying.
There is a girl in bio drinking beer out of a starbucks cup with a straw
I haven't been "cry when you eat ben and jerrys" high in a while.
the bar told me i would have to take an hour break so they could wash the shot glasses
We tried lying really still and being really quiet so that he wouldn't notice us before he left the room. Forgot about the glow in the dark condom.
Why did this happen to me why did I have to meet him if I could go back in time I never would have grabbed his dick
I am stoned at Disneyland with my little brother. It's gonna be a good day.
Cancun blessed me with a drinking problem
I just want some dick and chicken fingers please advise
Yeah I either headbutted a street sign while texting or I defended you two from an evil gang of nazi muggers. I was black out so I am gonna assume it was option b.
you were so drunk that when the mouse on your laptop didnt work anymore you decided to just take it into the bathroom and pee on it while laughing like a mad scientist.
It's been THREE DAYS. Why do I still have the munchies?!
Randomize
