Why don't I have your new number? And who have I been texting?
already putting money aside for 4/20. you ready for the greatest tuesday ever?
just gave him road head on the way home IN A SNOW STORM..good thing we didn't crash or I'd be dead. I DIDN'T HAVE MY SEATBELT ON
clearly you have your priorities straight
normally i'm against accepting campers on facebook but this one saw me giving head to another counselor and didn't say shit about it to my boss so i feel like shes earned the right to look at my sloppy drunk pictures
white trash bash was a total success...cops shut it down twice and her hair stayed in rollers all night..she never broke character
Whoever put the tambourine in the dryer is a douche. Worst hangover wakeup ever
Also, I don't remember opening my gifts from my family. It was cool when I woke up with a new ihome.
Thanks, girl! That means a lot. I can't wait to share my jail stories with you over salad and cupcakes.
Would be in best interest to sanitize the DVDs
Just witnessed a fat waitress doing whipits in the back of a waffle house.. my life seems a little brighter..
I'd cum everywhere if I could have chicken nuggets right now
i puked in a jesus candle last night and then denied it... i'd say it was a pretty alright night
Got my client divorced finally. He was even awarded the cat ashes. Yep I went to law school for this.
It’s just hard to believe you really care about me when u haven’t touched my dick in 2 months
I'm in the upstairs bathroom. I went to the bathroom after class and realized this is not a shit I want to have publicly. I ran home. We can go to lunch, just give me a min
Randomize
