he just sent me a friend request on facebook. i wish it were physically possible to vomit on him through the internet.
Ps what kind of horrible ppl are we that we both checked blackberries during sex and neither minded?
don't bother texting me at 10. my pants WILL be off and I'm not putting them back on to come see you.
Just looked at my call log. I called Planned Parenthood at 3am.
on the list of things id be doing when i was almost 30, waiting for a girl to finish shitting the bed wasn't on there.
Professor used "ROFL" while grading my paper... Do I even go to a real college?
Have $25 to my name but it's $2 pitchers. I have no choice but to go.
I hit a bug from across the room with my flip flop boomerang style. That awesome.
So apparently the only parts of last night I remember didn't actually happen.. When did vodka become a hallucinogen?
I'm dressed like a deranged cupcake. Let's get fucked up.
Well, we broke up and instead of putting my shit out on the curb like a normal person, she fucking donated everything to Goodwill. So now I have to pay two dollars for one of my own t shirts.
I'm sorry if you weren't drunk enough to be peer pressured into the naked dancing/group make out that transpired last night
He will be so fat that the winter can not penetrate his blubber.
When you wake up to a porn star on your couch telling you, you better tell your boyfriend about last night.
are you drinking tonight?
I have an exam tomorrow
so yes.
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