i think i pulled off the nice guy thing too well. it just backfired later on when she thought i was actually nice.
You told the waitress last night "What tip bracket do I have to be in to see your boobs"
I fell asleep to the sounds of them banging in the next room. It was oddly soothing...
So... he formspringed me a link to every nude pic ive taken since he 8th grade. ive evolved nicely. but im nervous as to how this a website.
HAPPY NEWYEARSM FAGTRON! GETTING HEAD IN TAXI I WIN
just lying in bed drinking beer with a straw waiting for motivation. why?
Well, he has like 3 girlfriends but I think I could be polygamist for that dick.
While you were in the ER we decided to tailgate in the parking lot until security told us that's not allowed.
I vaguely remember chanting "USA" at the pool when we were talking to the Frenchies.
We were pointing at fat people and chanting USA.
I am wrecking havoc on the skinny girls by going home with the big one. She is taking me to see her dog now.
The best part about drinking boxed wine is you can blow up the bag and use it as a pillow
He asked me if I remembered touching his police badge. awk.
Nothing tops off the night like giving emotional and spiritual guidance to a 70 year old transvestite.
I'm naked in a forest ranger station right now
I can't believe my vagina just got wished happy new year
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