This is evicking siegelnvs
Im sorry?
This is fucking ridiculous*
I hope to God it wasnt poon. That odor was unnatural, it was satanic pussy.
He was wearing a Knicks jersey I had to go home with him. it was a rough season.
found a cell phone. in the freezer. wrapped in bologna. explain?
The Vegas crew is in two groups, Team Vodka and Team Fireball. There is no winner in this.
IF HE CAN'T EVEN MAKE EYE CONTACT IN CLASS, I DOUBT THERE WILL BE OTHER FORMS OF CONTACT ON OUR FIRST NOT-A-DATE DATE
I swear she's a drunk klepto...by the end of the night she had stolen 3 bowling balls. HOW DO YOU STEAL 3 BOWLING BALLS?
I just farted in the bathroom and the guy in the stall next to me started gagging. Its a beauitful day
If they weren't representing Obama and the White House, they definitely would've punched me in the face.
And all I ask is the occasional "welcome home from work" blowjob.....and for you to fold my laundry. I hate folding laundry
Did you just tell me you watch cartoon porn because it's more real?
Would it be sad if I made a blanket fort to get drunk in till the power came back?
So I almost broadcasted the porn from my phone to the boardroom chrome cast
His phone started ringing when we were pulled over and he said 'hold on, this is most likely more important than you', proceeded to answer it and agree to work sunday, then hung up, looked at the cop and told him to continue.
That chick keeps sending eggplant emojis
Welcome to dating in the digital age. Better catch up now that you’re divorced
and eggplant is code for penis. It means she’s DTF. Go get her tiger!!!
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