Btw I've read that book you bought me...And I'm such a bitch now
But I don't think guys love me
Alli causes anal leakage. You can find someone to like you if you are fat but no one will like you if you poop yourself.
There is something about listening to Patsy Cline while pooping that makes the experience so much better.
like the penis drawn on my face is so detailed and well done, i'm not even upset about it.
I have a page in my 2010 scrapbook dedicated to pictures of his cock.
If we get out of this alive, I'm never going to a Denny's at 3 am again.
Thanks man, but unless some hot chick comes in to work with a case of beer and offers me a head job, I'm pretty much screwed for New Years
Well you just missed the ten chi o pledges singing la bamba at our doorstep.
if i ever wake up in the morning and don't feel a boner in my asscrack then this relationship is over
we had a full conversation and he only brought up drugs twice. overall I'd call it a success
I am stoned, not wearing a bra, and a woman. There is no way in fuck I am getting on a fucking bus.
I'M GOING TO FUCK AN ENTIRE ORCHESTRA AND NOTHING CAN STOP ME
The band club does not count as an orchestra
I hate men. But I love dick. You see my problem?
Remember that St. Patrick's Day when I fucked your married coworker in his truck and the whole bar was chanting for you "Don't fuck Mike"?! #TheLuckOfTheIrish 🍀
as i was trying not to drunkingly fall off her toliet, i noticed her socks laying there. i quickly grabbed them, ran upstairs, and excitingly asked her if she had gotten them at sams club. she replied with, "...those are your socks."
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