last night was fun... but i spent all morning tring to get the candle wax out of my chest hair. We did use candles last night?
Professor used "ROFL" while grading my paper... Do I even go to a real college?
I should have some sort of frequent buyer card or something. I just bought my third bottle of Captain this week. It's Wednesday.
I'm sorry but when I'm riding in the trunk on the way to mcdonalds at 6 am I just don't want to listen to reba macintire
His sister just told me that she thinks i'm a stupid bitch and that by going thru with this I'm ruining his life.
sounds like a hell of a rehearsal dinner
we walked in to her beating him with a broom while he was trying to sweep ramen into a box. there were packing peanuts everywhere.
It was awful until we put her on a word ration. And she rationed her words accordingly. I love blondes.
i just sat down and hooked up with this girl. after she left i called over another girl and did the same. this happened about four more times and i never left my chair
She fucking ripped my chandelier out of my ceiling. How does that make her a keeper?
We're gonna go drive around campus and throw water balloons at all the drunk bitches wobbling around, wanna come?
i feel like there is just so much pressure to sex him up, its like the weight of the world is on my vagina.
you should be awarded for your promiscuity.
i really should.
My life is a video game called get the drunk princess back to her castle, thank you to all that participated
ugh i want to get waxed but I’m afraid. my vagina has had enough trauma this week, i don’t know if I can put her thru any more.
As much as I hate to admit it, some day ill need a man because I can't open jars myself and you can't 69 a dildo
Like I don't even know how to respond to this?
Randomize
