he stopped mid-fuck to ask me how my day was....
No more Irish car bombs ever.
we are torturing ourselves with these mediocre cocks
I was naked with an australian flag taped to my boobs. Damn internationals think they can claim everything.
I remember all the people and all the acts I just have to match the person with the act
Just you wait I'll be crying and puking everywhere in no time
got one for peeing in public....called the cop a donut dunking communist...should be a fun court appearance
No Bryan wants to get drunk, rub inappropriate dudes legs, talk about my vagina and send me pics of his boomerang dick. That's not how you watch basketball.
That's how he does EVERYTHING!
When you pick me up at the airport, please have some sort of drugs on hand.
I'm gay. Congratulations to whoever had January 2014 in their pool.
This strip club is mediocre. Talent is fine. Fung shui is bad.
I know he works a lot but c'mon man. I 69'd you the first week we boned. Put a little effort in. Fuck.
havent showered in 2 days. just Febrezed my balls in the car before going into a movie alone with a 40 of Guinness.there isn't a word in English for how single I am.
Excuse me I just made a hot pocket without burning down the house, I think i can do anything.
Vegas never ceases to amaze me. Hung out with a stripper from ATL all night and got nuthin, but the next night meet a bride-to-be who gives me a bj in the elevator.
Randomize