So i told my advisor i had to drop the class bc the prof said "supposably" and "irregardless" within the 1st 10 minutes of the 1st class; she agreed with me that dropping it was the best choice
some guy just asked me if water gets in a vag when girls take a bath. WTF. it's not a wind tunnel!
The dentist just giggled when he accidentally shot water across my face, I can sense how he treats women.
I'm buying eyelash glue, salt, and limes. We know how tonight is ending.
we kept pushing you at the prospective students saying go for it, itll make them want to come here
you kept yelling THIS ONES FOR THE ADMISSIONS OFFICE and then youd go in for the kill
Bisexual Viking-cowboy hybrid is at the bar again
Dibsssss
I might come over. Something about you makes me matronly and I have this urge to nurse you back to health with soup and a blowjob
It wasn't until I took a shit, that I remembered that you assholes started spiking my shots with tobasco when I wasn't looking last night. Dicks.
I've seen people win free drinks for a lot less dude, no need to drop trou on a piano.
I think I'm done drinking. How did we end up partying at a frat house with my mom...
You humped everything and cried in an uber.
Just cropdusted a little kid that wouldn't get out of my way in Kroger. Welcome to the real world bitch.
Still riding the magical train of drugs so, yeah, Id say I feel great
I just took a shot before my midterm. Gotta keep things in perspective.
It was a crazy night: tears were shed, blood was spewed, and bottles were emptied.
Randomize
